5 Michigan Cities Whose Names Sound Like Prescription Drugs

You drive past, through, or even on some very odd-sounding cities, rivers, and streets daily without giving them a second thought. Every state has them, but Michigan has some real doozies! Most of them have roots in Native American languages that don't roll off the tongue easily.

Related: Kayaking Drunk and Other Ways to Get a DUI in Michigan Without a Car

Even the fine people who run Michigan.gov know that our state is loaded with tough-to-say names, so much so they have a webpage dedicated to pronunciation. Many of these names sounded so absurd when you first hear them. With that in mind, here are 5 Michigan cities whose names could be a new prescription drug

5 Michigan Names That Sound Like Medical Conditions

1. Ypsilanti

Ypsilanti is a very intimidating word for someone outside the Mitten but, it could be passed off as a revolutionary cure for vertigo.

Side effects of Ypsilanti include an increased desire to drive to Ann Arbor, consult your parole officer before leaving the city.

2. Onekama

Onekama looks like it sounds one way, but chances are it’s the wrong way. If you think: “That’s easy, that’s one-comma.” you would be wrong. Think more O-Neck-A-Ma. Onekama sounds like it could be the latest balm to relieve joint pain.

Just one application of Onekama and you'll be ready for the 30 minute Michigan goodbye. Side effects include moving sylables where they shouldn't be.

3. Grosse Ile

Come on this one is a layup! Grosse Ile could easily be passed off as digestive issues in one of Michigan's aquatic species, but that’s too easy.

When you need relief, remember Grosse Ile for your IBS. Side effects may include a bloated sense of self importance.

4. Ocqueoc

Home to the Lower Penisullas largest waterfall is Ocqueoc. This writes itself:

5 out of 6 doctors recommend Ocqueoc for better flow. Side effect may include Upper Peninsula waterfall envy.

5. Hamtramck

At first glance, Hamtramck looks as though you follow an 'm' with 'ck' and my mouth is unable to perform such a feat without looking as though I am in some type of distress.

You just tried it, didn't you? Let everyone know you're okay.

We found the blockage and with several treatments of Hamtramck, we were able to dislodge it. Side effects may include an overwhelmng desire for cabbage.

So there you have it, Michigan towns as prescription drugs. Side effects of reading this article may include a desire to get the last 5 minutes of your life back.