Michigan's Traveling Salesmen – and My Experience with One

I remember when I was a kid and seeing TV commercials that mentioned “a representative will be coming to your neighborhood with your chance to win $100”! Naturally, living in small town Michigan, these chumps never came to small towns – only the cities like Lansing, Jackson, Detroit, etc...NEVER to a small town. But I waited and eyed every stranger that came walking down the sidewalk. Nobody ever came to offer us $100.

The ones that DID ring our doorbell were the traveling salesmen that pitched their junky vacuum cleaners, floor polishers, encyclopedias, curtains, dishware, kitchenware, magazine subscriptions, sewing machines etc.

The vacuum cleaner salesmen were the worst. It wasn't so much the salesperson himself – it was the product. It never worked like he said.

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I had a vacuum cleaner salesman come to my home many years ago and I let him in. He rambled on about how wonderful the machine was and that it could pick up everything. At the time, I had a shag rug.
“Even on a shag rug?” I asked.
“Yep. It really sucks up the dirt.”
“I'm really not interested.”
Not paying me any heed, he said “Let me show you.”

He proceeded to pull out a container of Morton salt and dump it all over my living room rug. Then he plugged in the machine, turned it on, and attempted to suck the life out of my floor. “Now take a look” he mumbled. I got down on my hands and knees, parted the shag, and by golly.....there were still piles of salt in the rug. So he went over the rug again, trying to suck up the salt. No good. Still plenty of salt in the shag.

I said to him, “Gee, thanks for trying but I really am not interested.....but before you leave, get that salt out of my rug.” Probably embarrassed, he spent five minutes - at least – attempting to suck up the salt he poured all over my rug. After he finally left, I went over and inspected the rug. There was still salt.

He was right about ONE thing: his vacuum cleaner really did suck.

(Below is a gallery featuring images of old traveling salesmen – even the ones who sold vacuum cleaners – from 1900-1950s.)