There, There: The Top 5 Ways to Soothe an Angry Michigander
Let's face it, bad moods happen to the best of us in Michigan. Whether it's rain on your fishing trip or construction on your commute, there are a number of ways to upset someone from the Mitten State. But, true to form, there are some things that only a Michigander will truly appreciate, so much so, that it will change their mood. Here are The Top 10 Ways to Soothe an Angry Michigander
1. Take Them to a Meijer
Just like a crying baby is soothed by the gentle swaying and vibration of a late-night car ride, a miffed Great Lakes state native knows the healing power of Meijer. Much like a dog on the way to a park, a Michigan resident gets excited even on the way there.
2. Give Them a Vernor's
Ginger Ale tames the savage Wolverine. The sound of a Vernor's opening, whether glass bottled, in a can, or from a plastic bottle, has a unique hiss when it's cracked open. This sound alone will make an upset Yooper stop in their tracks, by giving them some you're guaranteed to hear a story about how someone gave them Vernor's when they were sick.
Related: Michigan's Crimes Against Food: Ope! You're Not From Around Here
3. Offer Them Some Superman Ice Cream
There is a condition here: It must be good Superman Ice Cream. None of this dyed vanilla stuff. Hudsonville Ice Cream and Kroger have the right flavors of this Michigan staple.
4. Tell Someone From the South to Complain About the Weather
Hearing someone from down south say something akin to "I think I might need a sweater" is like ringing a fight bell for a boxer. Any chance we have to tell the tales of wonderous snow storms or, watching our fathers stand in the front yard and either throw things or yell at a tornado.
Related: When a Tiny Michigan Town Was Pummeled By Over a Foot of Hail
5. Tell Them Where You Went to High School
Not sure what it is about this question in Michigan, but once you tell us anything that identifies your hometown, we instantly have a name of people we know who either live there, lived there, drove through there, or mentioned it once in conversation and we have to ask you if you've met any of them.
There are many other ways to soothe an angry Michigan resident, what's you're favorite go-to comfort activity?